Woo Girl, You Better Hold Your Haunches! – Meet The Sponsor

Woo Girl, You Better Hold Your Haunches! – Meet The Sponsor

Oh, people… have I got just the thing that your butt needs. Well, I don’t have it, but my girls over at Hold Your Haunches do.

Hold Your Haunches

A while back, a friend posted on Facebook about these amazing pants that would make your butt look fabulous AND you could wear them outside the house. Well, I had to know more about this company! Lucky for me, we’re from the same area in Middle Georgia, have lots of friends in common and ooh, my Daddy has sold them some jewelry. So I poked around and Erin and I chatted and decided that presenting you, my awesome readers, with their product was the thing to do!

Now, I’m sure you all have fine looking back ends but really, who wouldn’t like for a little extra support back there? I know I would, but then again, I don’t have a fine looking back end. *sigh*

I posed a few questions for Erin and Jenny at Hold Your Haunches. They’re the Head Haunchos and the ones to bow down to when you see how amazing you look in their pants!

These look like the yoga pants I bought at Target that I wear my Spanx under (I don’t do yoga OR wear Spanx, fwiw). What makes them so stinkin’ different?

Well, these are NOT the yoga pants that you bought at Target that you put your Spanx underneath for several reasons.
  • Your Target yoga pants, while lovely we are sure, have a high cotton content therefore losing their color and shape as you wash them-unlike HYH.
  • Spanx are essentially the control top of a control top hose. That level of support may be enough  for 20 year old haunches, or the haunches of a 40 year old professional trainer on The Biggest Loser. Our extensive research (much of it visual) led us to putting medically graded compression in our pants. The people behind us silently thank us every day.
  • Why wouldn’t you buy a high performance article of clothing as opposed to being the girl hiding in the corner putting her Spanx underneath her leggings/yoga pants? BTW, we have both been that girl before.

Here’s a before and after from their site:

from holdyourhaunches.com

I’m a total fashionista (ha) and only buy stuff that celebrities and awesome people buy. I’m sure y’all don’t sell to those people, though, since you’re from Macon, GA. (I throw this in snarkily because when my husband was running a million dollar PR agency out of Macon, nobody took them seriously. Jerks)

You are correct that Rachel Zoe has not come-a-calling at our plant behind the Little League Baseball complex in Macon, but once we get HYH’s on the right rear end, she WILL come and so will her copycats and proteges. We CAN brag that Tracey Jackson (writer: Confessions of a Shopaholic) is one of our biggest fans. She found us on Twitter at @HeadHaunchos!

What if I said I’m already skinny (again, ha) and so I don’t really need these?

To quote Jenny, “Your ass doesn’t have to be fat to be jiggly.”

Well said, Jenny. Well said.

What made you girls decide to do this? I mean, don’t y’all stay busy enough with tennis and book club and school pick-up and stuff?

The dream started when one of us (*cough cough* Erin) could barely make it through an exercise class for worrying about her jiggly behind. Upon discussing  the concern with her close (and skinnier) friend Jenny, it was discovered that she, too, had experienced similar distress. When the leggings craze enveloped the nation, both of us were left feeling like 2 fashion lovers forever sidelined by childbirth, reality tv and margaritas. Once we asked our friends and other women about this, we found we were truly not alone. And this was from women of all shapes and sizes.
Plus, we may be half nuts.

I know my butt has a right to look tight, but I also have a right to bare arms. Do you have plans to figure out how to tame arm flab or any other flab in the near future? Or just sticking to butts? What are the Head Haunchos thinking are the exciting next steps?

Well, we currently offer Pants, capri-length leggings and regular length leggings. All are made with Supplex® fabrics with medical grade compression fabric sewn in. This makes them able to increase circulation, help prevent varicose and spider veins, improve posture and reduce swelling.

The Haunchos are up for continuing to design items that make everything on us look high and tight. Send suggestions — we like free creative consultation.

——————————————–

So the Head Haunchos sent me a pair of HYH Pants to review and holy moly, girls… these are amazing!

The pants are very long and upon getting them I realized I needed to have them hemmed. They are double layer so only the outside layer was long. The lady had to take FOUR inches off! But that’s ok. Now they fit.

The bottom layer is the compression layer. It’s snug. But uh, it’s what keeps you tight.

The outer layer is the Supplex® layer and looks to be just like a regular yoga-type pant.

The best part? Remember when you said you would NEVER wear those maternity pants that came way up over your belly? But when you did you thought you’d surely won the lottery because it held everything up? Yeah, that. These pants have about a 4″ extension from the top to control (bells ringing) your muffin top! The angels sang Hallelujah when I put mine on.

The worst part? If you don’t know, I live in Georgia. I mean, Hell. And these pants have two layers of fabric. Erin said they have not found the fix for hot as hell temperatures yet so that’s just a warning. I do plan to wear these this summer, but with very light tops and when I will be inside more than out. In the winter, they will be ALL I wear, probably. I haven’t tried the capris but feel like they’re probably a bit cooler, just because they’re not long.

I took one for the team and took pictures (gasp) of my back end to show you the difference. If you want to stop reading now to keep from being permanently scarred, do so. You’ve been warned.

Before = Target Yoga Pants, After = HYH

But it gets better. My mom was at my house when I took the pictures and she put her 63 year old haunches in my pants. She and I ARE made differently. She’s thicker above the hips than I am. I hold my weight at and below my hips. But she gave me permission to show you all how amazing they look even on a “senior citizen” butt. (I may have just gotten myself marked off the Christmas List).

So there you have it. Hold Your Haunches!

There are many ways to find them. Click on the ad over in the sidebar >>> , follow them on Twitter, Like them on Facebook or just go order yourself a pair! Tell your friends. Tell your family.

They’ll change how people see you, from behind. And they’ll probably thank you for it!

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Comments

  1. Thanks Jana!!! Love the blog- you are soo funny and you “get” the haunches and haunchos! Thank you for all the support, no pun intended..hehe. One way to beat the heat in the haunches, is to go with the capri’s. I have been testing them in this 103 degree nonsense and they are def. cooler. but hell, the only way to stay cool is to stay inside-this is ridonkulus! Love your blog and we thank you thank you so much!!

    • I’m gonna have to order a pair of the capris! They’re SO cute! Hope to shoot you girls some new customers who need their bootays tightened!

  2. Oooh, girls. I think I love you. I need a mid-section shaper that will help me wear sheath dresses!

  3. I love your bravery Jana:) No one has seen my butt ON PURPOSE in awhile:p

  4. Love them! And go you for showing us your butt. Just the way any #sisterbitch of mine would do it!

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