AL in Dadeville Can’t Kill Our Spirit

February 17, 2011 By 19 Comments

Yesterday was a sad day in the Auburn Family.

It came to light that after the Iron Bowl, someone who calls themselves “AL in Dadeville” poisoned the 130 year old oaks that create what Auburn fans revere as Toomer’s Corner. Here are a few quotes from yesterday’s press release.

The university learned that a caller to The Paul Finebaum Show, a nationally syndicated radio show based in Birmingham, on Jan. 27, claimed he had applied the herbicide (after the Iron Bowl in November). As a precaution, soil samples were taken the next day and sent to the Alabama State Pesticide Residue Laboratory on campus for analysis.

The lowest amount detected was 0.78 parts per million, described by horticulture experts as a “very lethal dose.” The highest amount detected was 51 parts per million, or 65 times the lowest dose. Experts believe a normal application by itself would have been enough to kill the trees, which are estimated to be more than 130 years old.

“We are assessing the extent of the damage and proceeding as if we have a chance to save the trees,” said Gary Keever, an Auburn University professor of horticulture (one of my professors) and a member of Auburn’s Tree Preservation Committee.

You can hear the call to the Paul Finebaum Show here.


Fast Tube by Casper

Sigh. I’ll give you a minute to regain your composure after hearing that clip.

So. There you have it folks. The deed has been done. There are things they can do to try to help the trees but from what little this horticulture degree holding girl remembers, there’s not a whole lot of promise that these trees will make it. I know the professors and they will do all they can to help them.

Toomer’s Corner has, for decades, been a gathering place. It’s been the host of celebrations, reunions, photo ops, protests, rallies, engagements, LIFE.

It’s a symbol of our University and has been for years.

My parents rolled Toomer’s Corner.

I rolled Toomer’s Corner.

I had hopes that Henry would one day roll Toomer’s Corner. Looks like that won’t happen.

Toomer's after the National Championship celebration. Taken by me. January 2011

In keeping with the Auburn Spirit, students and fans and friends of the University turned out in droves last night to salute the still-standing cornerstones of Auburn. The trees were rolled with toilet paper just like they would be after a victory or a graduation or any other celebration. As cheesy as it may sound to outsiders, tears were probably shed, memorials were probably left, pictures were taken… it’s as if an old friend is dying.

I know, I know. You can’t compare a friend dying to a tree dying. You’re right. But let’s put it this way. It’s the same as if somebody hopped the fence at the Seilers’ house and poisoned Uga or lit a match and burned down The Grove at Ole Miss. Maybe it’s like killing Mike the Tiger at LSU. I wish Alabama had a live mascot or anything worth a crap that I could compare it to, but alas, they don’t. Apparently, to AL in Dadeville, it’s comparable to taping a jersey to a statue.

Speaking of Alabama. As much as I’d love to think it was a student, I know better. Their students and alum ARE classier than that. Yes, I said it.

AL in Dadeville’s loyalty to Alabama probably goes no deeper than his cousin’s cousin’s half sister’s mother knew somebody who went there in the 70′s. He’s probably never set foot in Tuscaloosa and never will. But now? Now he has done something so unspeakable that even true Alabama fans are disgusted with him. No. Our “fans” shouldn’t have taped a Cam Newton jersey to the Bear Bryant statue. That wasn’t classy. But it DIDN’T FREAKING KILL SOMETHING. There’s a big difference.

I hope AL in Dadeville mans up and steps forward and gets what he deserves. I also hope (MAKE NOTE) that Auburn fans don’t do anything equally as stupid in retaliation. Let’s remember the “turn the other cheek” rule and let this play out with the Auburn PD and federal investigators that are on the case.

Auburn has class. Let’s show it.

AL in Dadeville has done what he could to kill our trees and kill our Spirit. The fate of the trees is left to the professionals and Mother Nature at this point.

Our Spirit? Well, that can’t be killed. Once you have it, it can’t be taken from you. Our memories can’t be taken from us, either. If he thought he could take those things from us, well, he was just wrong.

If you want to support The Toomer’s Trees, there’s a Facebook group to join. You can also follow @toomersoaks on Twitter.

War Damn Eagle!

10:00am ET: There has been an arrest made in the case. A press conference will be held at 11:30 ET to give more details. Will update with more info.

12:00am ET: Harvey Almorn Updyke (who has relatives named Crimson and Bear) will likely be charged with 3 felonies. The trees likely will NOT make it, according to a teared-up horticulture professor. The poison has leeched into surrounding soil and likely will stay in the soil for several years.

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A Not-So-Appropriate Valentine To Give

February 11, 2011 By 29 Comments

No, I’m not talking about herpes, gonorrhea or the Clap… I’m talking about Valentine’s Day gifts to your “work spouse.”

“What is a work spouse?”, you ask.

Let me give an example, that’ll be easy. Jason owned his own PR firm for about 10 years. He had a work wife. Her name was Heather (it IS still Heather, she’s just not his work wife anymore). She was his right-hand-girl. She kept him straight. She was his closest confidante about all-things-work. She was (is) his friend.

They traveled together. They pitched to clients together. They fought and made up (not out). They pored over the everyday dramas of the company together.

I love Heather. Heather loves us. Heather thinks Henry hung the moon (and vice versa). She did things for him that I couldn’t help him with because, well, I’m not a PR guru.

Heather was the all-time-best Work Wife.

Yesterday, I was turned on to a story via a Twitter Friend MookTheOriginal. I’ll give you a second to read over it.

Click for the WSJ’s story by Sue Shellenbarger

Cue the Jeopardy music…

waiting….

damn, y’all are slow readers…

ok time’s up.

So. Hmm. I’m not a fan. In fact, this really pisses me off. Valentine’s Day is not a day to show your love to your work spouses. Not. At. All.

Valentine’s Day is for lovers (read: spouses, boyfriend/girlfriend, boyfriend/boyfriend, girlfriend/girlfriend, and small school-aged children) and has now crossed a line in my humble opinion.

This is such a slippery slope. There’s so much room for emotional lines to become fuzzy and for even a small Valentine gesture to turn into something more for one of the parties. The work wife may give a card and some chocolates to the work husband and the work husband think she’s actually flirting with him. Which, in my opinion, she IS. But this could, with one little “token”, take a turn where someone does something stupid. Like fall in love. Or assume there’s more to the relationship than there really is. It just crosses the personal/professional line.

someecards.com - Wishing you a Happy Valentines's Day and complicating our professional relationship. Love, Your Work Husband

Maybe I haven’t looked hard enough, but most Valentine’s Day cards are filled with sentimental, goopy, glittery, love chatter and most boxes of chocolates are shaped like hearts which equal LOVE. I don’t want my husband giving images of love to his work spouse, no matter how much we ALL love her.

As a wife of someone who has had a work wife, I can say from experience that it’s hard not to feel jealous. Especially if there’s a lot of travel or late nights at work. It’s hard to keep your brain from going “there” and thinking that there’s more to it than just work. Now, the logical part of me knows better, but sometimes it does get hard to ward off those feelings. Knowing that my husband had given his work wife a show of affection on Valentine’s Day, a day reserved for love and passion and doting on your spouse, I would have been really hurt. I mean, REALLY HURT. And mad. It would have been hard to get my brain to stop going “there” if you know what I mean.

I asked Jason’s opinion about this last night. As much as he loved having a work wife and appreciated all Heather did for him, he said he thought it would be highly inappropriate to give such a gift to someone you weren’t in a relationship with on Valentine’s Day. We both agreed that Christmas is different. Jason always picked Christmas gifts for his employees based on their likes and personalities. It was special that way. He put a lot of thought into it and they were always surprised and grateful. And they were really more of an end of the year, “woohoo we made it” gift than anything.

So what do you think about this? Am I overreacting? Should I just shut up and let people give Valentines to anybody? Where does it stop? Do we start giving one to the mailman, pharmacist, trash guys, favorite banker? They all do things for us that other people don’t… much like that work spouse.

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Tuesday Rants

January 25, 2011 By 23 Comments

I don’t normally talk about current events but this morning I’ve had the news on (won’t mention the channel) and am horrified at several stories. Give me a minute to talk them out. I’d love to hear what YOU have to say about them!

1. Apparently BATH SALTS are now being used by teens to get high. They are snorting, smoking and injecting these bath salts that are clearly made for us moms to use to ESCAPE unruly kids/teens. The effects are about the same as meth and kids who are using this form of drug are cutting themselves, going on psychotic rampages and even taking their own lives. These are BATH SALTS, people.

Louisiana has outlawed, by an emergency order, the bath salts after receiving over 125 calls about this chemical to Poison Control in three months.

I have two problems with this. First is WHO first decided to open a packet of smelly bath salts and snort them? Surely they were on some other drug already, right? Second, at what point do we have to lock away everything except water from our children and teens? And does it stop at teenagers? No. It’s adults, too.

As parents, how do we know what “safe products” aren’t “safe”? Is soap next? Juice? The packet of cheese in the Kraft Mac & Cheese box? Shampoo? Am I going to have to keep the shampoo locked up and then dispense it to Henry in the shower only “as needed” so he doesn’t drink it to get high off the eucalyptus scent?

**End Bath Salt Rant**

2. Outlawing Walking While Distracted. Arkansas and New York are considering outlawing Distractions to Pedestrians. I guess after that dumbass on YouTube that was texting and fell into the fountain at a mall, the lawmakers decided we needed to be protected from our own dumbassness (read: ability to text and walk).

I’m going to go on record as saying I fall into the “Stay the Hell Out of My Business” party with fiscally conservative and socially liberal leanings. That’s all I have to say about that. I don’t talk politics as a general rule.

Back to the matter at hand. So they want to outlaw pedestrians being on the phone, listening to their iPod, texting or doing anything else that might be distracting, up to and including daydreaming probably. By that token, shouldn’t they also outlaw not only texting and driving, but also car radios, GPS’s, DVD players for the kids and hell, THE KIDS from being in the car? Those are all distracting (especially the kids).

As I said on Twitter this morning, the idiot on YouTube that fell into the fountain didn’t need the law to protect her. She simply needed to NOT be an idiot. Stupid isn’t a crime and honestly, as much as it SHOULD be, will never be illegal.

Last time I checked, the states of Arkansas and New York had much bigger problems than protecting idiots from themselves. Like budget shortfalls, homelessness, jobless rates, education… but this is what’s important? I’m sure the victims of domestic abuse, assault, identity theft, robbery, arson, etc would much rather the police force and legal system help protect them from real criminals instead of wasting their time protecting us from our own stupidity.

People need to simply (while walking or jogging) be aware of their surroundings. Be adults. Be responsible. Don’t make those of us who DO act like responsible adults pay for your idiotic behavior.

**End Texting and Walking Rant**

What’s the moral of this story?

If you snort bath salts and try to text while walking, you could injure someone or yourself and thus create drama which creates laws that the smart segment of the population is going to hate you for.

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The Great Gift Debate

October 29, 2010 By 13 Comments

I wanna know.

Do you let your children open their gifts at their birthday parties or do you wait until after?

It’s been several years since I’ve been to a party (other than my own child’s) where the birthday boy or girl opened the gifts at the party. I am heartbroken when we get in the car and Henry asks me, “Why didn’t he open my gift?”

I know, I know, all our kids are spoiled beyond all recognition and might say something stupid.

First I want to go on record that I DO let my child open his gifts at his birthday parties. Ok, so at his first party he had a meltdown and we had to stop early but still…

Is this new trend because we* want to pack all the fun into the party and don’t want to make the kids be still?

Is it because we don’t want to waste precious (expensive if you’re paying big $$ for the party) minutes of the 2 hour party?

Is it because we don’t want to clean up the trash?

Is it because we might be embarrassed if we got the same gift somebody else brought?

Is it because we might have only spent $10 and everybody else spent $40?

*we = y’all… not me!

I think it’s more like this, honestly:

You haven’t taught your child to say “thank you” when they are given a gift.

You haven’t taught your child to say “thank you” even when they already have what they are given.

You haven’t allowed your child to roam the aisles at Target for half an hour painstakingly choosing the RIGHT gift for their best friend. The right gift that will make his face light up like a strobe light when he opens it.

You have gone yourself and picked out what you think the child might want or what’s the cutest thing out there now. OR worse, what’s bigger and better than what your child got at their last party.

You are scared YOU might be uncomfortable if something awkward happens.

You forget your child is, well, a CHILD and may or may not say something stupid (be they the birthday kid or a partier).

If you don’t want your child to open their gifts in front of their friends, how about just ask us not to bring a gift. And mean it. And that means, other parents, if somebody says “no gifts” you shouldn’t bring a gift! Maybe a card, but NOT A GIFT!

Kids are kids.

Don’t you remember being SO excited when you were invited to a party to see how much the guest of honor loved what you got them? If not, you have a cold, black heart and are a party pooper!

Don’t you remember counting down the days to your birthday and wondering what great things you would get from your buddies?

I know we all have too much. We are all spoiled freaking rotten. Adults and children. I just purged Henry’s playroom and came up with two bins of stuff to take to Goodwill. I could come up with 4 more bins if I didn’t think World War 3 would start up in my home.

Our kids don’t NEED anything. But they DO need to learn graciousness, thankfulness, humility and also disappointment. These are teachable moments. Talk to your kids about being thankful for the gifts they receive. Teach them to say “Thank you.” Teach them NOT to say “I already have that.” Teach them to write thank you notes.

These are lessons they will take with them for the rest of their lives.

Also. Let your kids be kids!

*Discuss if you wish*

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They don't deserve to be called parents

September 17, 2010 By 7 Comments

I’m gonna do something I don’t normally do. I’m pretty mad. I’m actually VERY mad. At people I don’t know. People I DON’T KNOW are taking up precious space in my mind and I don’t like it. So I’m gonna let y’all be mad with me and I’m gonna get it off my chest. This story is the one that broke the camel’s back. Every time I read about somebody leaving their kid in a hot car, driving off a bridge, etc, I get this anger but I think I can release it if I put it out there.

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** WARNING ** Especially to my parents, mother in law and anybody else who could be offended by my language or tone – I’m so mad, the F word might be used – sorry. Also, the story is graphic and horribly sad. It involves the death of a child in very cruel and unusual circumstances.

**ANOTHER DISCLAIMER** I am not against young parents. I am against the HUGE population of young, unmarried, irresponsible parents there are out there. It’s horrifying, actually. I think young people have the ability to be good parents. It’s hard. But they can. Also, I don’t care how much money somebody has or what color they are. This rant has NOTHING to do with any of those things.

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Quick summary is a 25 and 23 year old unmarried couple starved their 2 year old to death. He weighed in at 12lbs 6oz when they found him. Here’s the story from The Telegraph (today)  and the original story (yesterday). ONLY read it if you are prepared to be disgusted, pissed and saddened. Otherwise, just continue reading and you can probably figure out the gist of it.

My gut reaction is to just be really sad that this poor little boy was starved to death. What kind of parents don’t feed their child? Who in their right (OR WRONG) mind can do this and live in a house with that going on? Then you realize that the two year old weighed only 12 pounds. TWELVE POUNDS! That’s 4 pounds more than an average newborn. These parents had no regard for this child’s life. Not one ounce of regard.

The only way this little boy was found was that the sperm donor (he doesn’t deserve to have the title father or dad) called 911 when he realized the boy wasn’t breathing. HAD HE NOT LOOKED AT HIS CHILD IN MONTHS? I don’t understand. How in the fuck do you live in a house and not realize that your CHILD weighs 12 pounds and should be probably 30 pounds and running around and playing and growing and THRIVING? HOW? I don’t care if you work nights or work weekends or they’re asleep when you get home. IT’S YOUR CHILD. Pay a-fucking-tention to them. All you have to do is look at a 2 year old and realize he should be bigger than 12 pounds. The sperm donor actually said “he was away during the day, often worked 12-hour shifts and had not noticed the child’s deteriorated condition.” Say what? Ugh.

There was another child in the house. A 5 year old who had been living with the grandmother her whole life until 6 weeks ago. Why did she go back? All of a sudden they wanted her to come home? Strange. The grandmother said she would have rescued the little boy if she had known. BUT they wouldn’t let her see him. I WONDER WHY!

Story gets better (read: worse). This is the second child they will bury. Three years ago, they buried their 2 month old that had died from asphyxiation while sleeping in the bed with the womb donor (again, doesn’t deserve mother or mom). These people buried a child, gave one away to the grandmother and starved this poor boy.

They don’t deserve the air they breathe. They don’t deserve the space in the newspaper they have taken up with their story. They don’t deserve the room in the prison they’re going to get. It’ll be too nice for what they should be getting. They should be starved to death.

That’s why I’m writing this. I have to get it out. They don’t deserve the space they are taking up in my head and heart. I’ve buried a child. It’s the most fucked up thing in the world. They obviously didn’t give a rat’s ass about any of these children. They are worthless and should rot in prison.

People need to understand that having children is not a right. You have to be willing to take care of them, be responsible, support them, love them, FEED THEM and nurture them. Children are a responsibility. Just because you CAN have one, doesn’t mean you should. And if you happen to have one and can’t take care of it, there are ways to – without prosecution – give them up. You can leave them with personnel at a fire station, hospital or police station in most states. They will find a loving family to take care of them.

Yes. I’m very angry. I’m angry for the kids. I’m angry for their other family members. I’m angry for the investigators that had to see this situation. It will haunt them the rest of their lives. I’m angry that my tax money probably went to give them a damn check every month to BUY FOOD for this boy and the parents probably drank, gambled and smoked it all away. And now my tax money is going to pay to put them up in prison and for free legal aid. And after all that, they’re still going to feel no remorse.

Most of all I’m angry for EVERY mother that has begged and pleaded with God to please let their child live. I’m angry for the fathers that had to bury their pride and joy and won’t get to play football with their boy when they grow up. I’m angry for the parents who desperately want a baby and can’t conceive one.

I’m angry that these worthless pieces of shit were given three gifts from Heaven and didn’t care enough to give them away because clearly they didn’t want them.

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I could go on for hours and for hundreds more words.

But they don’t deserve them.

So now I’m going to take a minute, pray for this boy, his angel sibling, his living sibling and the rest of his family.

I will pray that in some strange twist of fate these so-called-parents can find peace with the evil in their hearts.

And I will go snuggle up with Henry while he sleeps and thank God for every day I have with him.

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